Hello and welcome to the first of hopefully many tarot answers to your Gratitude Special questions! As a reminder, I’m taking any and all questions right now and answering them here with a three-card spread for ten bucks. I’d love to answer yours as well - details in the link.
And this first one is particularly apt for millions of us here in the U.S. who I’m sure are wondering the same thing:
S. asks:
How should my family cope with the incoming presidential administration? Should we leave the country? Resist? Just keep our heads down?
Honestly, S. had to clarify that this was a question for tarot at first, because I immediately went into empathy mode. I have the same questions myself. Who doesn’t?
It also strikes me as especially poignant going into tomorrow’s Thanksgiving holiday, which for many of us means spending time with Republican-voting family members - and struggling with whether to confront them on the disaster they’ve just created for all of us, or to try to stay neutral for the sake of familial peace. Meanwhile the holiday itself is an annual reminder of the genocide of America’s own native people at the hands of white immigrants, the decedents of whom are now poised to commit still more heinous crimes in the horrifically ironic name of nationalism. And to that point, I will also acknowledge that I am a white woman living on land stolen from the Shawnee, Wyandot, and Potawatomi people, among others, practicing a healing art which some argue is cultural appropriation in itself (I respectfully disagree, and probably I’ll do a post exploring that in more depth sometime soon, but for now I’ll just say that I nevertheless deeply bow to the closed practices of the Romani people.)
Normally I would structure a three-card spread as something like a main question (center) and two clarifying points, or something to let go of and something to invite in (left and right.) But S. has helpfully already structured their question in three parts, so I’m going to go with those. Reminder also that tarot as I practice it almost never works well with simple yes/no questions, so although these could be answered that way, I don’t think there’s anything simple about any of them. And I’ll be channeling these answers for S. specifically, but with the collective’s benefit in mind as well. That said, here we go.
Should we leave the country? 10 of Wands
Oof. This one’s heavy. Each of the minor arcana suits (wands, cups, pentacles, swords) correspond with one of the four elements (fire, water, earth, air) - and being fire here, you’d expect this to be a card about blazing enthusiasm, magic-making, energy and charisma. All things I’d normally say would be positive attributes of an exciting international adventure! But that’s clearly not what this is, is it? This card is also a 10, which in tarot means the inevitable conclusion of that suit’s energy - here, we’re talking burn-out, exhaustion. The heaviness of taking on too much, carrying the burden of those 10 wands on your back as you climb every mountain, ford every stream, literal or figurative. This card invites you to set some of them down, lighten your load, and pause to see the bigger picture.
You wouldn’t just be taking your family on a fun trip to Paris or whatever, you’d be escaping the imminent dangers of fascism, maybe civil war. Maybe leaving behind many dear friends and family members, with no assurance that you’d see them safely again, to say nothing of the financial hardships and many unknowns on the other side of such a move. Essentially, becoming a refugee. This is certainly not a decision to be taken lightly. And again, how ironic that so much of our current political climate is centered around those making such a decision from other countries, that those of us born here (on already stolen land) are now considering leaving.
On the other hand.. would the move itself be the heavy part, or is that more about what you’d leave behind? Is America itself those 10 wands, grown too heavy and burdensome to bear any longer? Have we collectively reached the end of this great experiment, born of fiery ideals and bloody revolutions, only to return again to the racist brutality from whence we came? It sure feels like that right now, and if so maybe leaving makes the most sense, if you’re in a position to do so.
But we just don’t know, do we? In a way, all three of these options - leave, resist, keep our heads down - are betting on an answer to this question of whether the America that we were taught in school to believe in, the beacon of freedom and democracy, is truly done for or worth saving. Will there come a point when the answer is obvious? Maybe. Will that point be too late to make your move? Possibly. Or perhaps your 10 wands don’t represent the either/or here at all, but the burden of questioning itself. Maybe you can prepare for a move - get your passports updated, reduce much of your belongings, make some contacts overseas - without committing to it just yet. So you’ll be ready when/if the time comes, or if by some miracle the horror doesn’t come to pass - well, who among us can’t stand to lighten our loads anyway. Meanwhile, you’ll have set aside some of the burden of worry and prepared yourself for whatever’s coming. That may be a happy-ish medium here.
Resist? The Hermit
Now, this is interesting to me. For one thing, this is the collective card of the year for 2025 - just like how this year’s has been Strength (or arguably Justice, depending on which deck system you follow.) Basically, you add the numerals of the year together (2+0+2+5 = 9) then look at that number’s corresponding card in the major arcana to determine the energy for our collective year. So 2025 is 9, and the 9th card is Hermit. So one possible take here is that this is the immediate answer: this is what to do in 2025. I’m not sure it’s that simple though (shocker.)
Hermit doesn’t sound much like a card of resistance on the surface. It would have seemed more obvious in the next position, of keeping our heads down. Usually this card is depicted as a hooded old man holding up a lantern, head bowed, leaning on his staff - he reminds me of Gandalf, or Dumbledore, or whatever other wise and magical grandfatherly white man in popular Western culture. I’m trying to decide between Obi-wan Kenobi or Yoda here. But really there are probably many more in other cultures too. But are these figures passive hideaways, or powerful rebels in their own right? Harriet Tubman also held a lantern, just saying.
The Hermit is not an invitation to hide. If so, I don’t think he’d be holding up that lantern at all - he wouldn’t want to draw attention to himself that way. And notice that he’s standing - he’s actually walking, if very slowly. But what can we see with such a small amount of light? Well, only what’s most important, that’s what. The Hermit invites you to see what’s right in front of you, and tend to that - and only that. To honor aligned timing, reflection, letting the path before you unfold one step at a time, at its own pace.
This is a deeply internal kind of journey, and a slow one. But make no mistake - this is not about limping away, defeated. It takes great power to go within and cultivate personal authenticity, personal presence. And that’s exactly what this new regime fears most - just like every attempt at leadership by power-over, rather than power-within throughout history. They depend on conformity. They want us nostalgic about a sentimental past that never existed, while worried about a bleak future and looking for quick, easy answers that they are only too happy to provide. They want us confused and angry and afraid. They want to tell us who we are. But what can they do with a populace that knows its own mind and confidently lives in the right now?
And what can we do with the right now? Look around. What’s right in front of you, in that lamplight? How can you strengthen your own sense of integrity, self-reliance? What resources do you already have to fight the gaslighting, the lies? What are some small, meaningful actions you can take? If you stay and fight, you’re not going to be able to do it every minute of every day. This is a marathon, not a sprint - and the revolution doesn’t need 10 of wands-style burnout either. What does aligned timing look like for you? It starts by going within, knowing yourself.
Just keep our heads down? The Lovers
Again, a very interesting card for this question. First, to be clear, this card is not necessarily about romantic love. It’s not necessarily never about that, and I’m certainly not going to sit here and pretend that there’s anything simple about romantic love in the first place. But I think the way it’s coming up in this particular reading is a perfect example of how so often it can be…. well, if not more complicated, much different.
Before I get into that though, let’s consider what it might mean to “keep our heads down.” I’ve framed this post with a subheader of “flight, fight, or fawn” - borrowing three of the four trauma responses coined by physiologist Walter Cannon, the fourth one being “freeze,” which in this case I think would be a little different, but maybe keeping our heads down is a type of paralysis too. But I’m reading it here as quietly just doing whatever you have to do to survive and get through this nightmare, not making waves, just hunkering down and keeping your opinions to yourself. Agreeing to disagree. Or agreeing, period. Even if you don’t. Because you don’t feel like you have a choice.
I read a post on social media earlier today from a woman who was angry at herself after coming out of a confrontation with a man whom she’d previously admired - he’d been a kind of spiritual teacher to her, in fact, until she’d discovered his MAGA views. When pushed, he’d responded as a “malignant narcissist” as she put it, and turned the argument around on her, making her question herself and back down. She found herself apologizing and later feeling just as small and confused as years before when dealing with an abusive ex. As a survivor myself, I can totally relate to this, especially the frustration with finding myself reacting the same way despite years of distance and therapy and self-insight. It’s a kind of fawning, for self-protection - but it’s giving up a piece of myself too. And I hate myself when I do it.
What does this have to do with Lovers? Well you know, if I were to design my own tarot deck, I would dispense with all the Adams and Eves and confusing couple business and make the Lovers card just one big mirror. It wants us to look at ourselves. It’s about reclamation. Every interaction we have with another person on this planet - including ourselves - is a kind of energetic exchange. Many of them are small, some are powerful, some are beautiful, some are damaging. Often they are uneven - one or the other or both of us projecting something, taking something, giving something away. Trying to make something happen externally that is really internal all along. The Lovers invites us to see the truth of these exchanges, and reclaim the pieces of ourselves we’ve given away. To love our whole selves.
That’s not easy when you’re staring down a potential firing squad, eh? And the truth is we all have varying degrees of safety and privilege that affect how much we can realistically speak out. But how many exchanges will we have before getting to the firing squad level? How much of ourselves are we willing to give away? The fascists (much like our abusers) will take it all, if we let them. They want our heads down, and many are already bowing. It seems like the easiest choice. We’re taught that “love” means sacrifice, giving, gratitude even. That it’s better to let your drunken racist uncle spout off at the Thanksgiving table and make everyone uncomfortable than to say something and risk being even more uncomfortable. But is it? How much of ourselves do we give away with this kind of “love”? Can we reclaim at least some of that back for ourselves, for each other?
There’s another aspect of Lovers here that frankly I find much more difficult to work with, but I’d be remiss in not at least mentioning it: it’s that whole idea of the “other” being a piece of yourself. Finding yourself within your supposed enemy, and learning to love them. Your drunken racist uncle probably has some common fears, deep down, for example, and maybe true change lies in talking about it. Honestly, there is probably a lot of wisdom to this but I’m personally exhausted with always being the bigger person and trying to find common ground. So maybe that’s why this feels like keeping my head down to me… or maybe that’s my own work to do. Food for thought there, take as ye will.
Now, before I wrap up, I should also mention that my initial gut reaction to seeing the Lovers here was “mutual aid.” I don’t really think of that as “keep our heads down,” or even really Lovers card work exactly, but in the more direct sense of loving action, that’s always a good thing. Can you fly under the radar while also quietly helping those who are suffering? I can’t see how that can hurt. I’m sure there are many organizations in your community who could use help - if you need ideas, hit me up!
Thanks for the question, S.! I know none of this is easy, and we’ll probably be continually asking ourselves these things in the weeks and years to come. I’ll be here as long as I can, attempting some answers. Much love and gratitude, ~Luna